Currently Browsing: Community
Parents sit shiva after son becomes vegan
Molly and Solly Greenbaum from Hendon have announced on facebook that their son, Archie, is dead to them now that he’s come out as a vegan. Mr Greenbaum told the Daily Jews he couldn’t understand how his son would reject their religion. “Archie was always very into his Judaism as a child. He would eat […]
‘Who do you think you are’ reveals every famous person has Jewish ancestry
BBC Producers have confirmed that every famous person in the UK has Jewish ancestry. The revelation comes as ex-footballer and TOWIE star, Mark Wright, will find out his forebearers were Spanish Jews and torture victims of the inquisition. Executive producer of the show, Fern Tree, told the Daily Jews that the show has become predictable […]
App designed to avoid dating mishigas
A new Jewish dating app is launching, designed to avoid the social embarrassment of dating in the community. “Jinder – Jewish dating without the tsuris” – will allow users to avoid matching with their friend’s ex’s, family and mashugana’s. Founder of the new app, Yorum V’layla, told the Daily Jews he had personally experienced many […]
Jewish mother arrested for forced-feeding local children
Photo: An artists impression of the Jewish mother A Jewish mother from Hendon, PhyllisPhilis Eeatalotski (52), has been arrested for force-feeding local Children. Mrs Eastalotski had been on the police’s watchlist for several years after having been reported to be soliciting chocolate brownies outside a primary school in 2015. The mother of five who is […]
JFS pupils four times more likely to get laid than Hasmo pupils
A new study published by the IJPR this week has shown that JFS male students and alumni are four times more likely to get laid than their Hasmonean counterparts. The study was conducted over 12 years and involved interviews with over 2000 students and former students. Jewish sociologist Kevin Ben-Hagrid told the Daily Jews that […]
Anger as Jewish Chronicle edits letter
A writer of a letter to the Jewish Chronicle this week wrote in an angry letter of complaint, to the Jewish Chronicle, because her missive wasn’t published in full. The complaint letter was published by the JC this week. It details how Helen Polishtownski’s 1000 word letter deserved better coverage. “My letter, which detailed the […]
Scientists invent time travel to kill composer of Hava Nagila
A small team of scientists from the Technion (Institute of Technology) in Israel have invented time travel. The team conceived the project as a way of going back in time to kill Hitler. However, they decided a more pressing matter was to kill the composer of Hava Nagila before it was written. In 2014 Hava […]
Makers of BroigusApp to release ShpilkesApp
The makers of successful mobile phone application BroigusApp which is now being used by most of the worlds Jewish population have announced a companion app called ShpilkesApp. Founder of BroigusInc the company behind the apps told us “I’ve made so much money from the first one, but I still can’t afford a house in Tel […]
How to be antisemitic and original
Here at The Daily Jews HQ in Fleet Street, Hendon, we’re tired of the same old boring antisemitism that gets bandied around. After a couple of thousand years, you’d think the goyim would come up with some better insults? Yes we have a big nosesYes we’re all wealthyYes we control the worldYes we eat Christian […]
New app tracks which of your friends and family are broigus with you
This reviewer found the app very easy to use. I synced my phone contacts and Facebook friends with ease, I managed to block 34 people in moments. I especially enjoyed setting up my broigus anniversaries. For example, I set-up a notification that said: “On this day in 1996 Doniel Richjew had the Moskowitzes for Shabbos dinner and didn’t think to invite me”.
